Shut Down Your Inner-Critic In One Easy Step

Your brain is an absolute marvel! A whiz! It lets us do some pretty incredible things. 

It's also a chatty little bugger who delights in sharing fear, doubt, worst-case scenarios, and pointing out all the ways you're not good enough and will most likely fail. 

The same brain that lets us dream up awe-inspiring things also seeks to drag us down into the depths of despair. It's so unfair! 

Every single one of us has an inner-critic. It's normal (read that again). If you didn't have an inner voice trying to slow you down or question the decision you're about to make, then that would be abnormal. Why? It's just how our brains are designed. 

Although all parts of our brain work together, certain areas are responsible for different things. A large portion of our brain is dedicated to the basics (i.e. making sure you feel safe and have what you need) and how we view the world. A much smaller portion is dedicated to higher functions like math and reasoning. As such, what we feel and believe carries more weight than what we logically think. 

Your inner-critic has one job, and it's not what you think. Its job is keep you safe by offering opinions based on its perception of events. However, its version of "safe" in reality looks like you're paralyzed with self-doubt and unable to make decisions. When you're unable to make decisions, you don't take risks. So, you're safe right? Yes, according to your lizard (aka survival) brain!

When your inner-critic speaks, we tend to listen and believe it even if it's saying some horrible things. In contrast, if an outside person said the same horrible things to us, we would likely have a completely different reaction.

Here's a little exercise to help you separate your inner-critic and give yourself a little perspective on its opinions.

Step 1: Opinions are just opinions.

Opinions are everywhere and it's up to you to decide if you're going to believe them. If someone says, "You're awesome" or "You're a bad person", both are just opinions. What you think and believe are the only things that really matter.

Step 2: Give your inner-critic its own identity.

It's helpful to separate your inner-critic from your own personal identity. This will help you view that voice as just another person in your life with an opinion. Think of this other person like a co-worker. It's much easier to take what they say with a grain of salt. 

Think of this step like designing a video game character. 

*Give your inner-critic a name.

*What do they look like physically? Male or Female (or gender fluid)? How tall?

*How are they dressed?

*What age are they?

FUN FACT: Many women discover through this exercise that their inner-critic is MALE! Once they realize this, they understand just how unrealistic and sabotaging their inner-critic is in their lives. 

Step 3: Once you've created your inner-critic avatar, analyze the information it gives you. 

My client *Mandy is an example of a female who had a male inner-critic unbeknownst to her before this exercise. Her inner-critic would make her feel terrible about spending money on "frivolous" things. This inner-accountant tried to talk her out of things like coffee, lipstick etc. because she had "perfectly good ones at home". Once we did this exercise, she was able to analyze the information her inner-critic was giving her and determine that it wasn't in her best interest. She chose not to believe her inner-critic and logically made her own decisions. Yes, she got a coffee at Starbucks and a new lipstick after that without feeling guilty! 

When you give your inner-critic all the power in your life, you're doing yourself a real disservice. It's only offering you one perspective and you have the power to decide how big of an impact that opinion is going to make in your life. If you want to make some real changes, then I can show you how to bridge the gap and take control of your runaway brain. 

Click HERE to schedule your consultation and let's get started!

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April Darley N.D. is an Emotional Strength Coach specializing in helping Empaths/Highly Sensitive People (HSP's) feel better, and function better by releasing stress, anxiety, pain, and sabotaging behavior. Through the combination of coaching and emotional release techniques, you'll learn how to step into your own power, comfortably deal with life's challenges, and stay calm and balanced.