Find Yourself: 4 Powerful Strategies to Overcome Feeling Stuck and Lost

When you really know yourself inside and out, then your life improves.

It sounds too simple to be true, but it is!

Every day, we're bombarded with external influences making us feel like we have to be, do, or act a certain way. Combine this with low self-esteem and confidence, then it's understandable why so many people in the world feel lost and confused. 

A common inner conflict that we all experience at some point is figuring out whether we should stand out or blend in with others. A piece of us wants to be considered special and unique. However, another piece of us feels like we need to conform so that others will love and accept us. 

If you're an empath, then you have an uncanny ability to sense and feel what's needed in any given situation, or to blend into your surroundings. It's almost like being a chameleon.

However, if these talents aren't fully realized or developed, then it can be hard to tell the difference between your emotions, pain, and desires versus those of someone else.

In essence, you can begin to lose your own identity piece by piece if you don't have a strong sense of self. 

In my practice, I use the Three Brain Realignment Technique (TBRT) to help my empathic and intuitive clients discover if the trapped emotions causing their pain and stress belong to them or someone else.

This technique can also help clients understand their issues on an entirely different level. Then, it becomes easier to let go of trapped emotions in the body, create lasting changes, and make positive mindset shifts for success. 

Because holding onto the emotions of others can be unconscious and unintended, we often don't notice ourselves slipping away bit by bit unless something drastic changes.

Some examples include divorces or break-ups, the death of a loved one, or a change in life circumstance like retirement or becoming an empty nester when your kids go to college.

After these changes, you may feel lost and unsure of yourself in so many ways. Here are a few suggestions of how to get back in touch with who you are and what you enjoy. 

1) Remember what you liked to do for fun in the past or try something new. 

This can be a hard one! Especially if you feel like you've been struggling for so long.

After I graduated from medical school, I had no idea what to do for fun anymore. After 4 years of extreme stress and studying almost daily, I had forgotten what down-time felt like. 

At one point, I was like a toddler trying different things in a desperate attempt to jog my memory or discover something new. 

If you're feeling overwhelmed and trying to bring more fun or relaxation into your life, think back to a time when you were less stressed and happy. Did you have any old hobbies that you've abandoned due to lack of time? If not, then you can follow your curiosity and try something new that interests you. 

2) Identify what you DON'T want first to help you clarify what you DO want.

It's a little quirk of human nature that negative things are so clear (it's a survival thing), but the positive stuff tends to be a little harder to pin down.

If you're having trouble deciding what you want or like in any area of your life, try writing down a list of what you  don't want first. Then, fill in the blanks by examining the opposite. Little by little you'll begin to fine tune your desires. 

3) Use a journal with prompts if you're really stuck.

If you've tried the first 2 exercises and you're still stuck, then consider using a writer's journal for prompts.There are various types of this journal, but they all begin by asking you a question to prompt you for a response.

For example, "What movie did you watch over and over as a kid?" or "What's your favorite memory from 6th grade?".

Make no mistake, these journals are going to make you think! They are designed to jog your memory and get things flowing in a creative way. 

4) If you're really, really stuck then consider the Three Brain Realignment Technique (TBRT) to help you make mindset shifts.

Scientific studies have confirmed that external clutter affects your mood. Guess, what? Internal clutter does too!

Your internal clutter consists of the pain of your past, trapped emotions, and limiting beliefs which are like faulty computer programs running in the background affecting your happiness and progress.

Doing a mental house clean involves letting go of what doesn't belong to you and replacing limited beliefs with something healthier. As we evolve, our belief systems also need to update or change. If this doesn't happen, even more inner conflicts are created.

If you're in the process of finding, knowing, or rediscovering yourself, then just be loving and patient. It's natural to re-evaluate what we think, feel, or believe. Staying true to your own nature and having fun are important steps in the process.

If you're ready to make positive and lasting changes in your life, then you can book an appointment with me HERE. 

April Darley is a Confidence and Resilience Coach specializing in helping overwhelmed women release anxiety and doubt so they can become more confident, decisive, and have better quality relationships with others. Through the Three Brain Realignment Technique (TBRT), you'll learn how to step into your own power, and comfortably deal with life's challenges.